Friday, July 15, 2011
All mothers who have been in my situation know exactly what I am talking about. You try to not look for signs, but still the only thing in your mind is "Is this it? Is it happening anytime soon? Is this normal?" because you are SO aware of your own body that every little change in the normality is a sign that you know leads you one step closer to the grand finale. How can it not be nerve wrecking being so close to that kind of truth?
My respect for mothers has increased massivly during this pregnancy and I've learned to be even more humble towards the incredible and strong female gender.
This past week has been all about trying to hold little A inside of me until M is arriving for a longer period, which is today. I have been glued in front of the television with episode after episode of Dexter, Six feet Under and so on, just to stay calm and make him stay another day in my warm kangeroo enviroment and wait for his father to finish everything at work instead of being forced to take an emergency ticket directly to the delivery. And I've seem to have succeeded, which is a blessing.
But now we have a couple of weeks together to get through this chaotic, amazing and life changing situation and I am more than ready to receive all the pain, work with it and experience this war of birth reality that all mothers have lived through in one way or another and capture and carry as a treasure for the rest of their life in their own unique and personal way. But it is indeed a surreal feeling when I think about the fact that I am counting the last days with this belly. My intuition says that in less then a couple of days, I will have a version of my own body back and instead have a new little body in my arms. Wow, wow, wow ...