Friday, November 9, 2012
I'm so in love with this man at the moment and sharing my life between Stockholm and Zürich is probably the best thing I've ever done. The biggest challenge positive and negative, the greatest adventure but also an enormous development when it comes to me, us and how I measure the importance of life. I look at things differently and I realise that in many ways, I had already grown out of Stockholm before. I also knew that I needed to make a bigger "life-situation" change for the sake of my family and everyone's wellbeing.
It certainly hasn't been easy to raise a child pretty much by myself for a whole year or to be pregnant very much on my own - but God have I grown, in my heart, in my mind and in my life. But in the same way, it's such a blessing to have what most people take for granted - an everyday together with with my man and with Alexis. As a passionate couple, as parents, as a family with a clear father role present almost every day, it's a gift and something we often take for granted because of the normal family structure.
Having traveled as much as I have, all my life, I felt like I was suffocating in Stockholm at the end and it didn't have that dynamic and international feeling which I've always loved and treasured. I felt like I was different, like I didn't fit in any longer and I always felt like there was something bigger and greater out in the world - and that the city and me really didn't understand each other. I hope you understand what I mean. The city of Stockholm is probably not the main issue, but I had already begun to change and when that sort of change has taken place, it's hard to just remain the same.
At the moment, it feels like it could have been anywhere, but with those ingredients, my man and my son - we could have made it anywhere. Home is not always where we are born and raised. Home can be where your loved ones are, where you decide it to be for the moment.
(coat: my own design, jeans: 7 for all mankind, shades: Celine & bag: Louis Vuitton)