Saturday, May 23, 2015

Necessary changes

Combining a great career with motherhood and a man who is often away, yes, it's absolutely tiring and not until now have I realised how much I actually struggle. When you work hard and coming home to two very needing children and everything else that belongs to a family life, it can really take the best out of you just because you try so hard to give all you can to each one of the areas, either it's a patient or my children. But since I started working half a year ago now, I have almost stopped exciting myself, there's really no time for Stina, not even 30min in the weekends because I always want to be with my boys (and my man if he is at home) whenever I'm not at work. I completely dedicate myself to them and always feel guilty when leaving them away to kindergarden for me to be able to work. I know they love it, but even so, I question the fact that someone else is taking care of my own children so many hours per day, I really think it's me who should do it more even though I also love it because taking care of two small children are a full time job itself.
This concern is especially when thinking about Leon, since Alexis had me at home for almost three years. I feel like I'm missing so much and I want to be more with my youngest, to give him the same sort of start in life.

So from next week I'll do some changes in my work scheme. I've been thinking about this for a long time and the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. Life is really here and now and I want to be as present as I possible can for my children.

So all new and old patient, bare with me, it will be harder to find appointments but just be out in good time when you book yourself and I'm sure you will hardly notice any difference!

Have a lovely Saturday and I just can't wait for this change that starts next week!

15 comments:

  1. You are very very strong and courageous dear Stina! Keep it! because the things will change soon for sure. Young, beautiful, a man very busy who loves you, 2 beautiful children, patience it will change soon for sure.
    Big higs

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    1. Thank you dear but I feel tired, negative and exhausted.

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  2. Hej Stina!

    Jag gick genom samma sort kärlek, önskan att vara med barn men tanke på karriär också. Tiden är att kvinnor vågar ha flexibelt arbetsschema och stanna längre med barn. Jag är civilingenjör och fick avstå till stor del från min karriär. Om många år framåt hoppas jag att vi kvinnor kommer kunna ha en flexibelt schema oavsett vad vi gör i livet när vi får barn och att samhälle kommer vara till stöd och acceptans. Stort lycka till du kommer säkert att kunna kombinera det så det blir till bäst!
    Vanesa

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    1. Well done, I think you will never regret that choice. Everyone I meet that is a little bit older, always tell me that the bets time of their entire life, was when their children were small.

      We need to find out what works the bets for ourselves and for me, I want to be more with my family and small children.!

      Thank you for the nice comment!

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  3. Hi Stina, could you work part time? I only work 4 days a week as a lawyer and I have always loved my Monday at home with my son- I make no plans and just hang out with him which we both love. I went back to work when he was 10 months old and I know the pang of leaving them, it's tough. I go into work later than I once did and I try to leave early if I can to collect him from day care. Can you carve out some time for yourself on weekends? x

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    1. I already to, I use to work 72 procent but will go down 10 procent more to have a better life setup!

      Thank you for understanding. Really is a hard struggle!

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  4. Good plan! Keeping your hand in just the right amount to keep current is all you need for now. Best to spend more time with your sons and make time for yourself. Work will always be there and when the children are older you can make a new decision about work family balance.

    I have a friend with small children and she job shares. She works 20 hours a week and another mother works 20 hours. Together they share one job. This seems to work for both individuals and their employer. Both women will increase their hours when their children are older. Interesting arrangement. I am glad employers support these arrangements for women with small children. Susan

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  5. You go Stina! You and only you know what is best for Stina and your family. And I am totally convinced that a happy mom is a great mom. Not saying that you or anyone is a worse mom, but we all know how it is when we are tired.

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  6. Hi Stina!

    You are such an inspiring person and I think you are doing the absolute right thing to spend more time with your family!

    I have a small question though: I have an appointment booked with you in a couple of weeks, will you still work then? Or will I need to re-schedule my appointment?

    Have a magic day!

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    1. If our receptionist haven't called you by now, nothing will be changed! You are more then welcome the day you had!

      Best,
      stina

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  7. Your precious ones can find them selves to be so lucky having You as their Mother! Big hug <3

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  8. Stina I love it that you take action on these things when you see an imbalance, good for you!
    This is going to be a great choice, this time does not come again that's for sure. How I wish I could go back and have that time over. Best luck xo

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  9. Hi Stina, I've never commented (on any) blog, but I just wanted to say a big thank you to you. You're a great inspiration, and you're one of the few Swedes I've ever felt is going through the same thoughts in life (I'm Swedish myself). For example, I read years ago in your blog that you always wanted to put your children in an international school (and I believe that was before you met your current partner), and that's the first time I've heard that from a Swede who's not in an international family constellation, apart from myself. I used to say that since I was about 14, and people found me crazy, but I always thought it would be an amazing gift to expose your children to an international environment. Since I moved away from home I've lived in several different countries, and I now live in London since a couple of years back. At the moment, you're my inspiration when it comes to how to juggle family life from Sweden with a man who works abroad, as I believe I will need to do the same one day. Sorry about the length of this message, but I've just been feeling very pensive lately, and don't know which path to take. You show me that everything is possible, so thank you for that. I've been listening to The Secret lately, also after being inspired by you. Thank you Stina for being a constant source of inspiration, and good luck with the changes you're going through - you're choice of cutting down slightly to have more time with your children sounds very healthy. With best wishes, Isabelle

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  10. Thank you Stina,

    for being true to yourself and having the courage to stop and think about, what is good for you and your whole family.

    And now, sorry, the feminist in me is talking now. On a side note, I've been following U.S. Politics for years, especially First Lady Michelle Obama, since her husband decided to run for office. There (and everywhere) it's still a huge mystery, why women should have it all: a career, husband, kids, and a dog or two. Why we are expected to take care of everything, without much help from society, and why we still feel like we are not doing enough. Ok, end of Feminist lecture.

    Thankfully, you still have the nanny, right, to help you with kids and the everyday chores?

    Listening to your own thoughts, your body and what they are telling you is soo important in life. One of the best lessons life can teach us, If we just stop and listen. Some don't have the courage to do not..

    Hopefully the reduced stress will help you with your migraine attacks and you'll get some much needed rest.

    You are a good mother, Stina. Most of the photos in this blog are about your kids, you are keeping them so active and you are being incredibly active with them. As you said, you devote so much time to your kids and you do need to slow things down.

    Taking care of two little kids and a home, and a career, while your husband is away, is a struggle and I often wonder, how parents can manage it all.

    With all the best for this journey you are taking,
    Nk

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  11. Follow your heart Stina, the time with your little ones is precious. I hope your life feels more balanced soon xx

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